Miss Manners

Avery is waaay more polite than Jeff and I can (solely) take credit for. She says please before you expect it, thank you or "tanks!" immediately (sometimes followed by a swift "you're welcome"), and she even says "I'm sorry!"

Avery's caretaker during the work-week, Donna, said that a lot of the kids are saying "please" thank you" and "you're welcome" --- but the "sorry" is all Ave! Donna said they don't really work on saying "I'm sorry" - at least not for little things. Avery's face is so genuine and concerned when she says it, whether she's spilling her milk or stepping on your toe.

She is the most concerned if she thinks someone is hurting, sad or in trouble. I've stubbed my toe or run into something (I'm hoping the lack of gracefulness comes with the pregnancy and is not long-term) and Avery comes over, gives kisses and says "all better, Mommy." I mean how can something not feel better when treated with that kind of tenderness? If you say "Ow," she comes sprinting over asking "Kiss it better?"

Avery does NOT like to be reprimanded and sometimes confuses an "explaining" or "redirecting" tone for a punishment. She gets really sensitive if she thinks she's done something wrong or if she's disappointed someone. I can relate! Jeff and I are both rule-following, people-pleasing people!

Love her sweet little spirit!

Sneak Peek

Just wanted to give everyone an update (and sneak peek of Baby #2)!

On Wednesday Jeff and I met again with Dr. Joy at the CMC Women's Institute. We had a MUCH more positive experience and enjoyable ultrasound this time around. Mostly because we knew what to expect a bit more. But also because our ultrasound tech this time around was wonderful, kind, sweet and so complimentary of our little peanut (the tech we saw 3 weeks ago, not-so-much). She said the baby looked great and was so encouraged by what she saw. Yippee! And we heard a strong, steady heartbeat of about 160.

The right kidney continues to have extra fluid in it (it actually got worse - went from about 5mm to about 8mm, and they flag it if it is 4mm+) but the interestinal/bowel area looked much better. Truth is, not a whole lot changed overall. The same concerns were still there. However, we were VERY pleased that there weren't any NEW findings, which was our worse fear. They will of course continue to watch all of the above.

Hello, baby profile!

Perk of being "high risk": 3d ultrasound

Since baby was measuring a bit on the smaller side last time, they wanted to see a good amount of growth. Everything looked wonderful. Still measuring about a little over a week "off," but baby definitely showed three weeks of growth since last time. Baby's weight was estimated at about 13 oz.

We got a good look at the cleft lip and they TRIED to see the palate again. We could actually see the little tongue moving around but still no confirmation about the palate. So, the jury is still out on if it is affected. We have a scan in 4 weeks and we will be able to meet with a plastic surgeon after that to talk about treatment/surgery for the cleft lip and what we can expect. This will give us a general idea and let us prepare mentally for it, but until they see the baby they won't know for sure what they will recommend.

You can see the cleft in the lip in the below picture - it looked different from several angles, so it's hard to say what it will look like when baby is born. So in love with this face... (even though the print-out scan doesn't do the extreme cuteness justice.)

For now, we are going to concentrate on what we DO know and not what we don't. There is so much unknown and gray area, and based on the conversations I've had with others over the last few weeks I'm realizing how common it is for the ultrasounds to pick up the "soft markers" and the docs have to give you the rundown on what it "could" be.

Thank you so much for your prayers. They are helping us to remain calm and to know that God is in control of the situation. We have experienced so much love and are so encouraged by all of the support. We cannot say thank you enough. But just for good measure,

THANK YOU.

(Writing it all in caps makes it much more effective, yes?)

Life is too short

March Madness

March has been a busy month!

We'll let Avery tell you what we've been up to...

I thought my bracket couldn't be beat! I spent lots of time on it:

So as you can see she was very shocked when UNC lost - who DIDN'T pick them for the finals?

Thank goodness Kansas is still in this.

Now, can you fix my bow, please?

Sometimes I get confused... like, I think I can use bubble wands as keys...

And I think I can use keys to "draw" on the wall

(Mommy got mad because I scratched the new paint!)

When cousin Parker came to visit, he and Daddy watched some b-ball on TV!

Aunt Erin and I bonded over finding cool cups with our names on them! Hooray!

But then I got mad that everyone was trying to make me pose for a picture. Can't a girl just enjoy her cup without the papparazzi?

Parker and I played very nice

(for the MOST part, aside from the lovely pushing/biting episode).

We climbed stairs...

Ate snacks...

And we really enjoyed dressing up and playing with our Mommy's scarves.

One of the most fun times we had was attacking Mommy with hugs. We went a little over board, but it was REALLY fun!

Watch out...

Here we come!

Mommy tells me there is a BABY growing in her belly... I'm not so sure about this!

Supposedly I have a new BFF arriving soon, but I think I'll stick with my kitty Stormie in the meantime.

And of course, try to look as cool as possible in my new sparkly shades.

I'm a big kid now...

Avery loves to mimic us, and sometimes she just cracks us up by acting so grown up.

She loves to read book on her own, but even more-so loves to read books to others. Here she is going through her animals with Baby Will (11 weeks old):

Chatting it up on Daddy's cell:

Trying Mommy's shoes on for size:

"How do they look?":

Searching her purse for some lipstick and her bracelet:

It's amazing how much they absorb at this age!

Learning and watching all the time...

Out and about!

With all of the beautiful weather in the last month, we have enjoyed getting out and about! Sure, there are still cold spells, but man, it's nice to get those patches of fabulous SPRING weather.

In mid February, we still needed a heavier coat:

But for Meg's visit over President's Day weekend, it was getting warmer... Coming down from Ohio, Aunt Meg hadn't even seen GRASS in months, let alone worn shorts! :)

Out at the park, just a light sweater was required!:

If you keep busy, you actually get really warm:

Are you eating the sand, Ave?:

How about a snack break?

(Random fact: Avery can gulp a juice box down in about 10 seconds flat):

The last weekend in February we were out blowing bubbles with short sleeves on! Yippee!

Avery really likes to try and blow bubbles herself, which pretty much means she enjoys the taste of soap. We're working on it.

Mmmmm.

Update... Baby White #2

Things have been a little crazy this week. And when I say crazy, I mean kinda scary & overwhelming too.

We've had some worrysome news in the last couple days. The first piece of news came from our ultrasound on Monday. First, the highlights: we got to see our sweet little peanut! Baby was calm, cool and collected. Sleeping, all curled up in a little perfect ball. We loved him/her at first sight, and had (finally) reached our decided not to find out the sex. Everything was checking out great -- heart, brain... things were a-ok.

However, our ultrasound showed our OB doc that there were signs that the lip and nose area was not formed correctly, pointing to a definite cleft lip. It also showed signs that the baby had extra fluid in the kidney. We were referred to the CMC Women’s Institute to get another anatomy ultrasound and to meet with a specialist in maternal and fetal medicine, Dr. Joy.

What?!

Yikes!

Our appointment with Dr. Joy was Wednesday afternoon (two days seemed like an eternity). Baby was much more active this time around, kicking and moving around (much to the U/S tech's dismay, as this makes her job more difficult -- but I was highly encouraged by the active movement). They were quickly able to confirm a cleft lip and let us know that they highly suspected that a portion of the palate was damaged too, though it is very hard to tell how much palate is affected until the baby is born.

Dr. Joy confirmed that there is extra fluid backup in the kidneys, but pointed out that this is pretty common in boys (though we still do not know the sex) and can self-correct by birth in both sexes. He additionally found what they call "bright bowel" which relates to the intestinal area. These two markers are more "normal" findings and, if isolated, wouldn't be too worrisome. However, the fact that baby is showing these along with the cleft lip is leading them to believe there could be more serious genetic issues. The baby is still showing NO sign of developmental issues in heart or brain, thank goodness.

Dr. Joy went over the risk of Down's Syndrome and Cystic Fibrosis, because our chances have now been elevated. To put it in numbers, the average women at my age has a 1/481 chance of having a baby with Down's. They have elevated my chances to a 1/48 --- 2% chance overall. ("2% chance" sounds a whole lot less scary than "10x more at risk than the average person"). We have heard the list of "what if's" and it is a bit scary and WAY overwhelming. We also went over several genetic testing options.

From there the conversation went into if we would choose to abort and I couldn't even believe we were going there. Never did I think I would be having a conversation like that in my entire life, especially just after I've seen my baby moving and kicking on the U/S screen. This sweet little innocent baby! It's really scary to know what you have the capability to think about when you are scared. Your mind runs wild. But, termination was not an option. This baby, OUR baby, is a gift from God and is being intricately designed in His perfect sight.

It's amazing to think that on Monday I was so freaked out about the cleft lip/palate and now that is the LEAST of our worries!!! We just need to pray the damage doesn't go back far even into the head to affect the brain (which, again, seems to be fine developmentally thus far).The cleft lip and palate can cause feeding and developmental issues, and of course call for surgery... but the resources are amazing nowadays, so I feel confident already that we will be in good hands. We will take one day at a time and trust the professionals.

Please keep us and sweet baby in your prayers.

We go back for a follow up with Dr. Joy on March 30th and may also meet with a genetic counselor that day as well. In the meantime I will also have a visit with our midwife, Hallie Lyon. We are praying that the kidneys will look more normal and that the intestinal issues will clear up by the appt on the 30th (where we will get another scan done). If there is an infection in the intestines, we pray that God clears that infection away.

Thankfully time is on our side and ANYTHING is possible before sweet baby makes its debut into the world. I am concentrating on remaining calm and productive, and am focusing on keeping my stress level down. I can tell you one thing I know beyond a shadow of a doubt - the love and protectiveness I have for this baby has increased tenfold.

Wanted to give everyone an update. We have mentally and emotionally exhausted, but we are trying to remain positive and we know that God is MORE THAN CAPABLE of miracles! :)

Prayers gladly accepted.

Much love,

Jeff, Kate and Avery